My happy ending
by LoZa
Summary: A short stand alone. Carter and Abby think about what could have been...(reviews welcome!)


A/N I don't own any of the characters and so on. No spoilers in this. It's based on stuff that has alredy happenned. Lyrics from the song "My happy ending" by Avril Lavigne. All credits to her for a great song!!!  
  
**MY HAPPY ENDING**

"Abby, have you got the labs I asked for?"  
  
"Umm...I'll get right on it" she answered.  
  
"I don't have time for this. I need them now!" She could tell he was angry. He had that stubborn look in his eyes.  
  
"I said I'll get on it ok" she snapped back, equally as mad. He stalked off, shaking his head in frustration.  
  
"Abby, can you help me in exam 1?" Susan called.  
  
"I can't. I've got to get these labs for Carter. He'll kill me otherwise. I'll get Sam"  
  
"Thanks"  
  
Abby found Sam, sending her to the exam room. Today had been a crazy day, as were most days in the ER. Although, it was making things that extra bit difficult now that Carter wasn't talking to her. She of course, had no idea why they weren't speaking; all she knew was that it was driving her crazy! As if losing him as a boyfriend wasn't hard enough. Now she'd lost him as a best friend as well. He wouldn't even look her in the eyes most days. He'd just put his head down, say whatever he had to say, and then leave. At least if she knew what she'd done, she could try and fix it. But they were both too stubborn for their own good. Too stubborn to be the one to come forward and ask what the hell was going on.  
  
_"You were everything, everything that I wanted..."_  
  
He knew he was being horrible. Not talking to her. Putting her through torture. He could tell she was hurting. It was in her eyes. She'd give him this pleading look, and he knew that if he caught her gaze he'd crumble. She was beautiful. So beautiful that he couldn't handle being in the same room with her. When he thinks of all they went through, he can never remember why he made such a big deal of the little things. He was always picking on her for something. Either that or trying to "fix" something. Most of the time it was the drinking and smoking, but he'd take all that nagging back in an instant if he could set them straight. They had so much history together. The friendship they had used to be so strong, he thought nothing would ever break that. He winced in pain as he thought about how perfect she really was, and how stupid he was for stuffing it all up.  
  
_"We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it..."_  
  
How could things have gone so horribly wrong? Abby had asked this question so many times before, it made her head hurt just thinking about it. She sat down on their bench by the river. They had something. She knew they did. From the moment they met they had chemistry. And not just a little spark either. We're talking lightening bolt! For years they remained "friends". Best friends actually. The amount of time they had spent here by this river was irreplaceable. He'd always been there for her, through thick and thin. Her family was a perfect example of this. Whenever things started to get tough, she always knew that Carter was there to comfort her. It was always at the back of her mind. "Not anymore" she said aloud, her voice on the verge of breaking.  
  
_"All the memories so close to me just fade away..."  
_  
He smiled as he thought of them together. The first kiss they shared in the lockdown was magical. He had so many different memories he couldn't decide which was his favourite. They were just the good ones though. The bad ones had been pushed to the back of his memory. The fights, the arguments, and the time he screamed at her to leave him alone. Those were the memories that were fresh in his mind when he wrote that stupid letter. Now he could hardly remember them. What seemed like the right thing to do at the time now seemed like the biggest mistake of his life.  
  
_"All this time you were pretending..."_  
  
As Abby sat shivering in the cold, she came up with a new theory. Maybe, Carter had been pretending all along. Faking it. Pretending he was in love with her when he really wasn't. Stringing her along. Maybe he felt like he had to be with her because of all her problems. Perhaps he thought that if she didn't have someone like him round she'd fall in a heap. Which, truth be told she probably would have. She let out a dry laugh as she thought about what she'd just come up with. She was going crazy! No one in their right mind would ever do something as heartbreaking as that. Especially not Carter. She'd also forgotten that most of the time it had been him following her around. Him trying to impress her. There goes that theory! She didn't know what to think anymore. She couldn't come to any sort of conclusion. Nothing was making sense. She wiped at her eyes as the tears began flowing steadily. She couldn't do this for much longer. It was turning her into someone that she didn't want to be anymore.  
  
Carter decided to go for a walk after his shift had finished. He didn't feel like going home just yet. He had been in such a daze today. He'd spent the entire day thinking about Abby. As he walked by there favourite spot by the river, he noticed someone sitting on the bench. Walking a little closer, he could hear them sobbing. He walked around the front of the bench, his heart melting when he realized who it was.  
  
"Abby. Are you ok?" he asked softly.  
  
She stared at him, and he wasn't sure if she was in shock or just pissed off. She began shaking her heed, drying her eyes,  
  
"No I'm not. I just spent entire day thinking about you. About us. And I can't work out why it went so wrong. It shouldn't be like this."  
  
"I know it shouldn't, and I'm sorry. I spent the whole day thinking the same thing as you, but nothing is getting any clearer. We need to talk properly. Sort everything out." He said, holding her hand.  
  
"Maybe someday we will. But not right now. It's too hard. Maybe you're ready but I'm not. I can't go through this again. I can't keep putting myself in these positions. I won't do it! I love you Carter, I honestly do. But I can't do this anymore. I'm sorry" She hopped up from the seat, walking quickly away.  
  
"Abby..." he called after her, but she was already gone. "I love you too" he said into the cold night air.  
  
_"So much for my happy ending"_


End file.
